Unless you are telling your 15 month old daughter, who in response says "Peese?". Try and try you might but saying and meaning it are two different things. If you can get past the pleading, then there is the sobbing, crying and inevitably banging her head and feet on the ground. Sienna is a master at getting what she wants. She starts out sobbing slowly and quietly, putting her little hand over her mouth, then her eyes. She peaks beyond her spread fingers to see my reaction. If not what she wants, then its full tantrum. I try to distract her, sometimes this works, unless its something she really wants then its on to bigger and more powerful tactics - Like Elmo. Depending on what it is I am telling her No to, I sometimes cave. Picking your battles seems to be a major focus of attachment parenting which is the parenting model I am trying to follow. Sometimes you need to let kids be kids, if it wont kill her or leave too much of a mess for me to clean up - its a free-for-all. Like playing with the dogs water bowl. I mean, what damage is actually caused by this other then some wet clothes, a mopped floor and a thirsty pooch?
I have learned to stop saying No too as it usually means nothing to her. She says No to everything, even shakes her head when it is something that she obviously wants. Instead, I try to reason with her, explain to her why her dog Oliver doesn't like when she sticks her toys in his ears or use him as a step stool, and direct her to something she can do. 9 times out of 10, this works. Other times, she ignores me completely, seeing how far she can push her independence. I have learned that how you get there is more important than the destination when it comes to raising children. Continuing to tell a child no has the potential to limit their independence and create feelings of self doubt. Bribing a child can create all sorts of unhealthy behaviors and do nothing to teach the child why they can or cannot do something. Where at 15 months, it may seem too young to attempt reasoning with your child, they are much smarter then you or I are aware. Sometimes a mother's calm voice and gentle hands are all thats needed to redirect the behavior.
I'll try some reasoning. My kid's little. She's getting harder to distract, at almost 11 months, and has an ear piercing yell when she's mad. I am trying to be more consistent on the battles I do pick-- for instance, with the phone -- her daddy NEVER lets her have his so its less of an issue, but then he also is less frequently stuck really needing to call someone and not able to put down the baby.
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